A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory. —Mark Twain
Elementary school was a difficult time for me; I was picked on quite a bit. One afternoon as I waited for the bus, a classmate ridiculed me relentlessly. My anger was building slowly, but when he said something about my mother, I walked over and kicked his kneecap. And he crumpled to the ground.
I boarded my bus feeling ashamed. All the way home, my conscience told me, That was wrong. I got off the bus at home and waited for the school to call my parents, but the phone didn’t ring.
While it appeared I’d gotten away with injuring that kid, condemnation ran through my thoughts: Not only was that wrong, but you are wrong. Even at such a young age, I resisted turning to God because of my self-condemnation. Surely, He wanted nothing to do with such a naughty kid.
Isn’t it heartbreaking how our conscience—something hardwired within all of humanity by our Creator—can be twisted in such a way as to distance us from Him?
Some of you are still struggling with your little judge. It’s reminding you of what you did in college, telling you how you messed up your first marriage. Your guilt has morphed into shame, and you’re convinced you’re simply wrong. Is there a way out of this mess?
Yes, there is a way.
I know what you might be thinking: Jesus came to forgive our sins. This is enough. We can live with the guilt if we are forgiven.
But there is so much more to our life in Christ than this, friends!
How much more, then, will the blood of Christ … cleanse our consciences from acts that lead to death … (Hebrews 9:14)
He wants you to be free—free from not only the acts of death, but also the guilt and shame that result. I don’t know what shame you live with, but I do know Jesus can silence it.
Jesus, shame is crippling me…help! Amen.